Indie Rock Bedtime Story

I was out sick yesterday and this is how I made use of my time. All the dialogue is indie rock song titles. It helps if you imagine both characters are foreign.

"No More Workhorse Blues" by Trousermouse (Palace)

Fade in.

Little Girl: Mister, would you please help my pony? (Ween)

Man: Sick? (Echo & The Bunnymen)

Litlle Girl: Sad and lonely. (The Secret Machines)

Man: Sometimes a pony gets depressed. (Silver Jews)

Little Girl: They shoot horse don't they? (Quickspace)

Man: If you're feeling sinister… (Belle & Sebastian)

Little Girl: Go ahead. (Rilo Kiley)

Man: Look away. (Apples In Stereo)

Little Girl: Don’t wanna. (Lemonheads)

Sound Effect: Bang! (Yeah Yeah Yeah's)

Man: There goes my gun. (Pixies)

Sound Effect: Bang! (Yeah Yeah Yeah's)

Little Girl: Staying alive. (Cursive)

Sound Effect: Bang! (Yeah Yeah Yeah's)

Little Girl: Don't Stop Now. (Guided By Voices)

Sound Effect: Bang! (Yeah Yeah Yeah's)

Man: Where's your patience, dear? (Matt Suggs)

Sound Effect: Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! (Yeah Yeah Yeah'sX5)

Man: Stop Breathing! (Pavement)

Sound Effect: Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! (Yeah Yeah Yeah'sX17)

Little Girl: Dead. (Pixies)

Man: Monkey gone to heaven. (Pixies)

Little Girl: Horse. (Sodastream)

Man: Yeah. Oh yeah. (Magnetic Fields)

Man: Looks like a mess. (Sunday's Best)

Little Girl: Hungry? (Stereo Total)


Spoon @ Warsaw 11-06

I love their last album and have never seen them. I like Warsaw and all especially considering they're playing the new Nokia Live theater in Times Square(capacity 2100) the night before. What I don't like is $30 tickets after Ticketmaster convenience charge. I'm torn like Imbruglia.


Wolf Parade @ Northsix 10/25

Originally uploaded by jonemmerling.
Lofty expectations made a really good show seem like a slight letdown, as Wolf Parade played the capitol of hip last night. It was my second time seeing them but my first after getting my grubbies on their mp3's last spring and more recently their hot shit album. Four gentlemen played their flaming hearts out, a theremin was rocked, and wind chimes took a beating. It was undeniably enjoyable, though the little hairs on my arm stayed down. I did finally get a handle on which guy sings which songs. To me they both just sound like Will Ferrel's impression of Harry Cary.


New Years Eve Show Update

Now the band's website and ticketmaster are saying they are playing with a "very special guest to be announced". David Byrne? David Bowie? Chris Dingillian?

I love the Jews

The Silverjews released Tanglewood Numbers last week and it's really good. To celebrate I will share some of my favorite Dave Berman lyrics. They are one part Gram Parsons, one part Steven Wright. Or maybe just Jerry Seinfeld on blotter acid. Anyway, they will not be making anyone's yearbook page.

-Punk rock died when the first kid said "Punk's not dead".

-You can't change a feeling, but you can change the feeling about the feeling.

-All my favorite singers couldn't sing.

-Tanning beds explode with rich women inside.

-I am the trick my mother played on the world.
Seventeen doctors couldn't decide
Whether I should be allowed in the game.

-What can't monsters get along with other monsters?

-I've been working at the airport bar
It's like Christmas in a submarine.

-My horse's legs look like four brown shotguns.

-I love to see a rainbow from a garden hose
Lit up like the blood of a centerfold.

-People ask people to watch their scotch.
People send people up to the moon.

-My ski vest has buttons like convenience store mirrors

-The drums march along at the clip of an I.V. drip
Like sparks from a muffler dragged down the strip.

-They sat there with their hooks in the water
With their moustaches caked with airplane glue.


I'm Back

And I miss concerts. Two weeks and already I don't know who half the bands mentioned on BrooklynVegan are. Arctic Monkeys?

Wolf Parade next tuesday at Northsix. Thursday at my Alma Mater. I have one extra for tuesday but so far no one is willing to commit and swear against bailing. I think it's going to be the show of the Fall. This ring feels weird.