10.24.2005

I love the Jews

The Silverjews released Tanglewood Numbers last week and it's really good. To celebrate I will share some of my favorite Dave Berman lyrics. They are one part Gram Parsons, one part Steven Wright. Or maybe just Jerry Seinfeld on blotter acid. Anyway, they will not be making anyone's yearbook page.


-Punk rock died when the first kid said "Punk's not dead".

-You can't change a feeling, but you can change the feeling about the feeling.

-All my favorite singers couldn't sing.

-Tanning beds explode with rich women inside.

-I am the trick my mother played on the world.
Seventeen doctors couldn't decide
Whether I should be allowed in the game.

-What can't monsters get along with other monsters?

-I've been working at the airport bar
It's like Christmas in a submarine.

-My horse's legs look like four brown shotguns.

-I love to see a rainbow from a garden hose
Lit up like the blood of a centerfold.

-People ask people to watch their scotch.
People send people up to the moon.

-My ski vest has buttons like convenience store mirrors

-The drums march along at the clip of an I.V. drip
Like sparks from a muffler dragged down the strip.

-They sat there with their hooks in the water
With their moustaches caked with airplane glue.

3 comments:

jonathan said...

One more from the new album:

Fast cars. Fine ass.
These things, will pass.

Alyssa said...

here are my two pence -
from 'starlite walker', and also DB's sorely neglected sans-SM 'the natural bridge':

half hours on earth,
what are they worth...
in 27 years
I've drunk 50,000 beers
and they just wash against me
like the sea into a pier.

...

what if life is just some hard equation?
on a chalkboard in a science class for ghosts.

...

everybody wants
perspective from a hill.
But everybody's wants
can't make it past the windowsill.

...

Outside you can see my footprints,
I've been dreaming
in your yard.

...

The Russian primadonna
dances slow on valium -
after the game
the benchwarmer can't get a ride.
In space there is no center,
we're always off
to the side.

...

When the governor's heart fails,
A state bird falls from a branch.

...

I wish they didn't put mirrors behind the bar,
cause I can't stand to look at my face when I don't know
where you are.

and one of my personal faves:

robot walks into a bar,
orders a drink,
lays down a bill.
bartender says 'hey we don't serve robots'
and the robot says 'oh but, someday you will.'


...dear god! somebody stop me please. if not i may do this all day instead of bloody working. ever again.

jonathan said...

I can't believe I forgot the robot joke. That's my fave of all time.